Getting down on all fours and imitating a rhinoceros stops babies from crying. (Put an empty cigarette pack on your nose for a horn and make loud “snort” noises.) I don’t know why parents don’t do this more often. Usually it makes the kid laugh. Sometimes it sends him into shock. Either way it quiets him down. If you’re a [...]

Never continue in a job you don’t enjoy. If you’re happy in what you’re doing, you’ll like yourself, you’ll have inner peace. And if you have that, along with physical health, you will have had more success than you could possibly have imagined.  - Johnny Carson For more inspirational and motivational quotes, visit “Secrets of Abundance”

We didn’t lose the game; we just ran out of time. - Vince Lombardi Hot Searches:funny football quotes

The other day I bumped into Santa Claus. A good bump it was, too! I ought to have been arrested, for there is no open season on Santa Claus. But sometimes a first class collision is an exciting thing. It will knock the wind out of you, and it may knock an idea into your head. True, this Santa Claus did not [...]

What is both surprising and delightful is that spectators are allowed, and even expected, to join in the vocal part of the game…. There is no reason why the field should not try to put the batsman off his stroke at the critical moment by neatly timed disparagements of his wife’s fidelity and his mother’s respectability. - George Bernard Shaw

Inspirational Quotes: Funny Quote It’s always darkest before the dawn. So if you’re going to steal your neighbor’s newspaper, that’s the time to do it. - Author Unknown inspiration Funny Quotes inspirational quote blog Like this Funny Inspirational Quote?? Send-A-Message! or leave your own favorite Funny Quotes in the comments.

Last week I stated that this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister and now wish to withdraw that statement. - Mark Twain

Inspirational Quote If they can make penicillin out of moldy bread, they can sure make something out of you. - Muhammed Ali 50% off Unique Inspirational and Motivational Framed Art!

Inspirational Quote: Funny Inspirational Quotes A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking. - Arthur McBride Bloch Imagine the smile on their face and feel the joy of giving with Send-A-Message inspiration Quotes inspirational quotefunnyblog Like this funny inspirational quote? Send-A-Message! or leave your own favorite funny quotes in the comments.

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